My kids are grown. Gone are the days of baking a bazillion cupcakes for their fundraisers and following them around to all their sporting events, making team dinner feasts and cheering them on loudly from whatever city they were competing in. Gone are the parent things that filled my calendar and consumed my time. I mean, I still have Lucy the Puggle Princess, but she’s not exactly as time-consuming {although, equally as needy!}.
So now what? What do people do at this stage in life? I’ve read that I should plant a garden. Hmmm. Check and check. So now what? I work from home. I garden from home. I almost always cook from home. So aside from the occasional trip to the grocery store, my human interaction is virtually nonexistent. So here are my options:
- Spend my days in high-maintenance suburbia staring out the window, recording the happenings of the neighborhood and tracking the daily pattern of stroller mom, ukulele man, and waiting for the mailman.
- Begin having full-on conversations with my only daily companion: Lucy. {This may or may not have already begun happening.}
- Get a job.
Don’t get me wrong, I have a job. It takes a lot of time and brings in a little income. I’m talking about an ACTUAL job. A real job, you know, one that involves getting dressed before noon and walking more than 20 feet to my computer. Yes, blogging is a real job. But I’m talking about something that will get me out of the house. Something with a little {or a lot} of human interaction. With rules, and a boss and lunch breaks and did I mention human interaction?
I need to hone in on my people skills.
But how do you do that when you haven’t had a job outside of the home for 20+ years?
What do you tell people when they ask you questions like…. “Do you work well with others?” Um, I don’t know. “How do you solve disagreements with coworkers?” Um, I’ve never had one. “How do you deal with stress on the job?” Um, I take a break and walk to the fridge or play with my dog. “What hourly wage were you looking for?” Um, I have no freakin idea.
How much do people make? And for that matter, how do you even find a job?
And the million dollar question: What do I wear to the interview?
Soooo, what do you think I’d be good at? Do you think this is a crazy idea or a potential fun adventure? And where do I start? I need your help!
Thanks in advance,
~ Mavis
Maria says
If you don’t need the money, why don’t you consider volunteering? The library? the food kitchen? Schools? All of them need people to shelve books, serve meals and do things. It will get you out of the house and you will have more social interaction than you can stand
If you need the money, that’s a different story. I work a few days a week at a local farm because I love chickens. I don’t make a ton of money but it gives me something to do and it’s something I really like
Leslie says
Great suggestion!
Gwenn says
Start a community garden program where the produce raised goes to a local food bank. You obviously know how to garden and how to get great yields from a small amount of space and you like helping people (you’ve helped me a lot!). Or get a job at a local garden center…again, you know your gardening stuff and you like people.
lynne says
Agree! I retired 2 years ago, at the ripe age of 46. Have “job flirted” now & then, but realized I love being a housewife more than anything. If financially you don’t need one – volunteer at a dog shelter, reading books to kindergartners, etc… LynneinMN
kingking says
Love the idea about the shelter, our local shelter uses volunteer dog walkers so they (dogs and volunteers) can get some exercise and fresh air. All these opportunities can lead to new friends, new contacts, and possibly a new job – if you’re still interested. Organized runs/races, art and craft shows, community theater groups, I could go on and on, all need volunteers to register people, hand out swag, give directions, and even keep the peace. I’m still working, but will welcome the day I get to do this without giving up a hard earned day off.
Brandy says
I love this idea! If I could, I would kind of thing.
I’d take a week or two finding an organization that really make s a difference and go from there.
Crystal says
And, benefit of volunteering is that it would give current job references for any future employment searches. Volunteering regularly with a reputable reputation would give something to do, and build the resume in the mean time while job searching.
Dana says
A friend of mine was an investment banker. 15 years of SAHM work later and she too is struggling with getting back into the job market. My advice? Start small. Take a limited mental capacity job, like barrista at Starbucks. Great company with great benefits and you can work only 20 hours a week if you want. It’s something to get your feet wet that won’t ruin your rep along the corporate grapevine if there’s some kind of blow up. You learn how to deal with people again, how to deal with a boss, (who may actually be younger, – much younger -, than you), they have a set hiring wage, etc.
It’s easy, may be fun, and gets your feet wet. If you decide to quit after three months, no recriminations.
Serina C says
I agree about Starbucks! I have worked there for the past 10 years because of how well the schedule works around my life outside of work. I went down to part-time 6 years when I had my first of 2 kids. Still working part-time and going to start on a bachelor’s degree that is recently offered for free through Starbucks. I have to use ASU online to do it.
It’s not for everyone though. Low pay (great benefits tho), very over-whelming at first (like learning a new language), working with high-schoolers, and customer service aspect will test you in ways never dreamed! I do get lots of regulars who are like family at this point! Haha!
With that said I do think working at or starting a nursery would be right up your alley Mavis!
Leslie says
I am in the midst of a major career move, so I totally get this. I’m going from being super career oriented to more family oriented. I interview for a new position on Wednesday! Tough to know how to play it, since it will be at someone’s home, and I will be one of two applicants at the interview.
But there are so many ideas, so many possibilities! Obviously, a nursery or garden center, work for your local farm market, or at a local farm, antique shop, freelance writer, author (fiction, travel guides, gardening, rug hooking, anything!), something at a local animal hospital…. all of those, and more!
I always think to start thinking of places I like to be, and people I like to be around. Next time you’re chatting someone up at that place, ask what it’s like to work there, and if they would recommend it. Mention you’re looking for a part/full-time job (or whatever) and see what they say. Maybe they will have an opening somewhere you already like to go! If you have some skills and knowledge, often, you just have to connect and be likable. Sometimes the skills and knowledge aren’t even necessary. I’m keen on the idea of working somewhere with benefits for part-time work and a good discount- like a nice grocery store, or something like that.
For attire, I always try to imagine what the person(s) interviewing me will be wearing, and try to dress similar, or slightly more professional (if it’s a casual workplace).
Amy says
Good luck!!
Pam E-P says
Start with volunteering. It can help you figure out what you’re good at and what you’d like to do. It can also go on a resume. I was a stay at home mom and when I found myself suddenly a single mother who HAD to go back to work, my only recent experience to put on my resume was related to volunteer work I had done. You might even find that volunteering for a few hours a week accomplishes what you’re hoping a job outside the home would do for you.
Kathy says
I did just that…after 20 years of stay at home life is all about the kids mom and GOT A JOB! I just filled out apps online and waited for calls. The job I was offered took 1 week: application, interview within 48 hours, background check and drug test 48 hours after interview, started job 7 days after filling out application. After almost (ahem) 40 years since I last worked in retail, I am a customer service associate for our local Walgreens. Didn’t wear anything impressive but dressed nice and did it. Three weeks later I’m loving my Monday through Friday daytime only hours.
Mavis, JUST DO IT. If you go outside your home for work, breath. The right fit will find you.
Mary-Ellen says
I don’t have anything to add to the excellent suggestions above as I have always been the bread-winner and DH the stay-at-home Dad. However, its completely normal and fine to talk to Lucy all day long! She’s no doubt a better listener than most people you know. That’s why dogs make such great companions – no need to feel guilty about that.
zoe says
Gardening center or local organic farm.
Chris M says
I would suggest school as a starting point — perhaps, just a class. What are you interested in? Can you take a class at the community college, or perhaps do something like master gardener or master recycling? This could help you determine some interests and whether or not you’d need to complete some kind of educational program to enter the field you’re interested in. Do you want a job, or do you want a career? If you’ve mostly been by yourself, do you really want to be around a lot of people; or, are you looking for something to get out of the house, but still have a sense of working by yourself? Last, can you use the skills you already have (baking, gardening, writing, rug-hooking) to land a job in a bakery, garden center, craft store? Would you like to start your own business? Good luck with this! It’s a journey …
Marcia says
Lot of good suggestions above –
– start with volunteering for an organization or two, and that can turn into a “real job”
– just flat out volunteer instead (my old boss’s wife apparently volunteered in a kindergarten class at my kid’s school last year, didn’t know it)
– figure out the kind of work you like to do. Example, Biz over at My Bizzy Kitchen was a legal secretary forever but really wanted to get into the food industry. So, she eased her way in with working at farmer’s markets, etc. (In the end, she couldn’t afford to live on food industry wages, but still moonlights in it).
– Consider temping
– Think about entry level service type jobs. My very first job was at a grocery store, and sometimes I wonder what it would be like to work at Costco or Trader Joe’s.
– Go to school? Coworker’s wife got her degree in counseling and works in social services now. In her 50’s. You kind of have to really WANT something though.
Anyway I like the interaction, so I never quit when I had kids. So, I hear you on worried about talking to the dog.
Juliannac says
I chat all the time with the cashiers/clerks at my local Trader Joe’s and one of them told me she used to work in a high-stress tech job and started working for Trader Joe’s thinking it would be a temporary break to clear her head. She ended up loving it and has been there for 10 years. Another cashier told me he had a degree in graphics arts but couldn’t find a good job, so he also ended up at TJ, loved the work and benefits, and the stability of it. I think they also get a discount on products (not all grocery stores give discounts). I also had a friend who worked for Costco and loved it. Most retail stores are hiring at this time of year and you could at least work a seasonal holiday job and see how you like it. I am a huge introvert, nothing would freak me out more than having to deal with hundreds of customers face-to-face each day, but you would probably love it! My husband is an extrovert and he’s worked in retail management for 30+ years. He really enjoys the public contact, even the cranky ones, because he takes it as a challenge to turn them into happy customers. Good luck! I am very happy as a stay-at-home/homeschooling mom, but we’ll see how I feel in a few years when my kid leaves the nest.
Deanne says
I homeschooled my kids for 14 yrs and have been out of the workforce for 25 years. We also moved around a lot due to my husband’s job. So having a reference is difficult. I’m perfectly happy with staying at home but I know that eventually once my youngest graduates I’m going to be bored. I have no idea how to start this. I’m not even sure what I’d be good at at this point. Very daunting
Angela says
What about trying a gardening centre or nursery? You’ve got SO much relevant experience, and it’s something you know you love to do! You might not have references, but you can direct them to your blog to verify your experience.
Tracie H says
I agree completely! This sounds like something that you would enjoy, and they would benefit from your vast knowledge. Good luck!
Christy says
I just did this. I got a real job outside my home. I’ve been mostly a stay-at-home mom for 20 years (with occasional odd jobs). I got an entry-level job as a unit clerk at an outpatient radiology center.
I answered my interview questions based on my jobs years ago, and also pertaining to my life as a mom. I prepared by reading an article about the top 100 interview questions and preparing answers for each. I had a phone interview, an interview with the manager, and a peer interview. (I found the job through the hospital’s website)
My pay will be 14 bucks per hour. The best thing is the insurance. 200.00 per month. My husband owns his own business so we were paying 1,100 per month for insurance and mine is a better plan.
It’s great to get out of the house and help people too.
Kim says
What about at a greenhouse or gardening store? Although that might be seasonal.
Emilie says
Since you know so much about gardening, how about at a nursery? Or how about at a vet office. More animals than humans to deal with. Hope you find something you love.
Melissa says
I don’t know if this would be for you since you hate the crowded stores, lol, but my mom was looking to get back into working but looking for less than full time and doesn’t need health insurance provided and easily became a sample lady at Costco – she really likes it – lots of human interaction, not mentally stressful at all, they would hire you in a heartbeat and utilize your cooking skills a bit and they are 6 hour shifts averaging you about 25 hrs a week – but include wknd shifts :/ – it wouldn’t head you toward a career but would be an instant easy hire and not a hard job but keeps you busy enough that the shift goes by quickly and you get to work with a lot of hilarious older retired ladies apparently.
Also, your blog is your biggest resume asset – you could easily show your talent for gardening or marketing – a nursery or gardening store would probably value your expertise or even doing online marketing/branding for some company – although that may not help with the human interaction piece. I liked what someone said about Starbucks but their hours can be not fun and you would have to start from scratch being trained as a barista – which would be fine if you want that skill set. Volunteering certainly is great but knowing your goal of trying to pay off your house as quick as possible, this does seem like a good idea to get a paid gig if you’re up for it!
angie says
If there are temp agencies nearby, make an appointment to come in and do a skills assessment. You can sign up to work as much as you want, learn what kind of jobs to like to do, and learn more about businesses. These jobs often lead up to you finding a good fit and permanent employment.
Pam says
I agree. Around here if you have some basic skills and you are a stable, reasonably intelligent person many temp agencies will actually teach you job skills that will bring you up to speed with what area employers need. And, it really would let you try out different job and see what you like/don’t like.
E in Upstate NY says
When my kids were in school I did temp work. Highly recommend doing it. In today’s economy, a company will try to limp along without filling an opening. When a temp agency is called, they are usually desperate. Your walk in, and almost anything you do as long as you don’t kill the computer is wonderful. Talk about feeling good.
With temp work, I was able to sample different kinds of businesses, found many company environments that I disliked and found some that I would go back to in a drop of a hat.
But most importantly, I found a career that I am really good at and that I enjoy. Without temp work, would never have even known that career existed, let alone that I was good at it.
My two cents worth.
Nancy says
I suggest starting small, but go with what you know. Get a part-time job at a plant nursery, or craft shop, thrift store, or volunteer at the animal shelter.
Katie says
Volunteering is a great place to start, but I’d suggest trying to marry the things you know you’re already great at. What stands out to me is cooking/gardening and social media/communications. So, how about doing communications or marketing work for the food or gardening industries? Or teaching in either of those areas? You’re also entrepreneurial. Would you want to help people set up their own home gardens? Or be a personal chef? You have a lot of talent, I’m excited to see where it takes you.
Tracey says
I worked for 15 yrs at a high paying, high stress job. Then quit to stay home after my 3rd child was born and have been home the past 5 yrs. I started looking this summer for a job and on a local job page on Facebook saw a posting where they were looking for a greeting card merchandiser. I emailed the lady, interviewed 2 days later and got the job. I can make my own hours and I love it. They were having a hard time in my area finding someone reliable who wanted to work so I lucked out .
Glenda says
I would suggest volunteering several days, a few hours per day, each week. It will give you the socialization you are seeking and still allow you to be home with Lucy. Dogs that have had full time human companionship, normally, don’t adjust well to being left alone for long periods of time.
Connie says
Sometime in the past 6 months you likely struck up a conversation with someone. Look at that company. See what positions they have open. Or, look at the position that person was in. Is it something you could see yourself doing? I’m beginning to dream about retirement and have started thinking about what I would do to keep myself busy. I’m looking into things like teaching the grandchildren to garden and cook. You have incredible organizational skills in lots of areas. What about volunteering in a school or YMCA program to teach what you know, computers, gardening, cooking, crafts, etc. Or in a college setting, home maintenance, budgeting, etc.
Susan says
You like taking photos of your dog.
You could volunteer at an animal shelter photographing the dogs/cats & etc.
If you are good, your name will get out there and you could start a business
as a pet photographer.
Tim Yeaglin is a good example:
https://www.facebook.com/184525636415/photos/?tab=album&album_id=10154602010176416
https://www.facebook.com/184525636415/photos/?tab=album&album_id=10154602097586416
Sadie B. says
If you like having weekends, summers and holidays off, try applying at school. Most need aides for students, substitute teachers/aides, or bus drivers.
Lisa says
Many schools have sub lists for needs from clerical to paras to food service. Get on the sub list and work the days you want/can with no obligation for the days you can’t/don’t want to work.
Lynda says
This is exactly what I did after 10 years out of the job market. I applied to be a substitute cook at our local elementary school. I ended up being made the Kitchen Manager within a few months! I have recently retired from that position and have applied to be a substitute cook at our local hospital. I just want to work part time without responsibility.
Patty says
I just did this after being a SAHM for 12 years. I volunteered so much at my kids school, loved the impact that not only I was making in the classroom, but the kids were making on me and went for it. I love it because I know I am making a difference in a lot of little kiddos lives as a paraeducator, and its the same schedule as my kids, with weekends, evenings and summers off!
Kim says
After operating a successful blog and building a following, you undoubtedly have excellent social media skills and marketing skills in addition to knowledge of specific computer applications. All of this is in demand both as an employee or as a consultant. A real selling point to you over a 25 year old for this position is that you are more seasoned, have had the opportunity to develop professional judgement, etc. With this type of position, you might be able to pick your level of interaction with others. For example, work one site 1 day and off site the others. Whatever your comfort level might be.
Ellen in Clackamas says
What about Seattle Tilth? Don’t know if they are all volunteers or have paid positions but I know it is something you have been interested in.
Sally says
Hmmm.. what about the public speaking circuit for approptiate groups eg libraries, U3Agers, Lions clubs, women’s groups, unemployed. Your topic is so compelling and affects us all. Not too sure about the remuneration from some of them but if it feeds into your blog then it is financially lucrative I imagine.
Or a co-op gallery /pop up market stall where you and others rotate selling your art, craft and food items across your area? Money and like minded friends. Good luck!
Sallie Borrink says
Personally, I would find something to do outside the house on a volunteer basis before committing to a job. You will give up so much freedom that you’re used to having. Have you considered strategizing ways to make the websites more profitable and then doing some non-work things?
Carrie says
I was thinking a nursery or garden shop would be perfect for you. Your blog is the proof of your experience. I am an Admin Associate for a city parks and recreation facility. I make ~$18 an hour, full time with benefits (I live on the east coast so things are probably different for westies). I love working at a park! We are always hiring part time positions (park attendants, program aids, lifeguards in the summer). The jobs are usually fun and laid back. It’s a plus if you get to be outside while working! My last interview was 3 years ago… I wore dress slacks with a simple blouse and cardigan and flats. Don’t over do it unless its for a high level job where suits and business dress is required. It’s better to be comfortable and confident. My now boss was wearing khaki shorts with hiking boots and a cotton tshirt while he interviewed me!
Sandy Frankel says
MAVIS BUTTERFIELD resumé:
1. I have successfully run an independent internet business generating xxx amount annually
2. I communicate with xx amount of on- line colleagues and followers on a daily basis ,identifying interests, ideas and solutions.
3. I organize an implement an internet based business of xx amount of customers and colleagues
4. I support the needs of xxx customers and colleagues
5. I work with xx amount of small businesses sharing in the support and growth of individual businesses.
6. I run a successful internet based small business with bot internet an direct sales initiatives
7. I balance several growing small businesses
8. I organize time, communication and daily duties of many small successful businesses.
Thelma says
I don’t know you Mavis, I follow your blog and from what I’ve seen, you are one very talented lady. I have worked in many different positions of management in sales and retail , as well as being self employed, and from what I’ve seen, i would hire you in a heart beat. Don’t underestimate the skills you have used to manage your life, children, schedules, and production at so many levels. You have worked with many people : teachers, coaches, local television personnel, contractors for your reno, etc…I’m sure i could go on for ages. Don’t be shy to blow your own horn, you deserve to, Skys the limit, what do you want to do?
Marie says
How about working thru a temp agency? If a job isn’t your cup of tea… You just try another.
Nancy W says
I’ve always loved working very part time plus I also blog. My husband was the major bread winner so it worked out well. Until a year ago when my husband was laid off. He’s managed to pick up a few small free lance jobs but nothing permanent. So now I too am looking to going back to work. I love my free time so I’m thinking something part time to start. Loved reading everyone’s comments! Very helpful.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do. You are one talented lady and I’m sure you’ll figure out exactly what you want to do!
– Nancy ( Nancy On The Home Front )
Amber says
I’m imagining this is all part of your plan to pay down the mortgage faster. 🙂
Is a job what you really want, or is it a sense of purpose?
Are there any special causes that you are passionate about?
Is money a driving factor, or do you just want a social life?
Is there anything you’ve put on hold while raising kids that you miss?
Is there anything you want to do so you will have no regrets at a later age?
Ask yourself, “you know what would be so fun?” And see how you answer yourself.
Write down an absolutely perfect day.
Write down your idea of a job from hell. Write down your idea of a job from heaven.
See if anything leaps out at you.
You seem incredibly goal driven, capable, and resourceful. If you don’t know something, you’ll figure it out.
I’m pretty sure any one of us would hire you in a flash. Let us know what direction you’re heading and perhaps someone will have a good connection for you. You
Karen says
Maybe just get a booth at a Farmer’s Market. Sell your extra produce.
One day a week might just be the right amount of social interaction. See how that goes, expand (or not!) from there.
Start a community garden.
Please don’t give up your blog!
Sarah B says
I love all the advice. I’m a SAHM, volunteer in son’s class. Was the president of a local non-profit. (good resume builder) But looking to go back to work part time during school hours. Where do people post jobs these days? Once I get organized and get my resume together, I will sign up for linked in. Not really into retail or food service. Maybe a doctor’s office billing or front desk. I love all the tips!
Carrie says
Indeed.com or monster.com have 1000s of job postings. You can also check the local paper’s website. Check for a professional organization in the field you are interested in – they should have a career section.
Emily says
Look for posted jobs but also consider cold calling any businesses offices you are interested in and sending your resume. Someone might not realize they’re hiring until they see what a good fit you will be, or they may know a related business that is looking and point you in the right direction. That’s how I got my current job. Sometimes it’s all about being in the right place at the right time. Good luck!
Cat says
This is my exact situation. My twins are almost 16, and my husband is almost retirement age. (18 yrs my senior) I have no education beyond high school. I am going to have to be the breadwinner soon. I’m looking into becoming a Real Estate Agent. I live in the hot market PNW. Crazy scared about it all. I just want to be a farmer/ housewife forever. But money is needed.
Kristina says
Have you considered travel writing? You’ve got a very specific voice and perspective when it comes to travel. I think your brand of careful frugal planning married to wacky spontaneity could generate a following. I’d read it for sure.
Amber says
Yes!!!!!!!
Laurie says
I agree!!
Cathy says
I think you’d be a great school bus driver !
And you’d love the summers off
Patty M says
How about teaching rug hooking classes? I think people would come. I know I would.
Amber says
Or make a craftsy.com class (or similar online learning company like creative bug, etc)
Susan says
I’ve heard that Trader Joe’s pays incredibly well (Google it) and likes quirky people. Might be a good fit. Costco pays very well, too, and has benefits.
Christy says
I was also going to say consider volunteering. If you really want a job start looking at interviewing questions (like the ones you mentioned) and look for examples in your personal life. “How do you solve disagreements between coworkers?” Consider how did/do you solve disagreements with your kids even they were teenagers. Think about transferring your life skills into workplace activities. Running this blog you have to deal with finances, time management, writing (obviously), etc. Get together with your friends and have them help you write this list. It is sometimes to see the things we are good at.
Connie says
I did this years ago after being home raising kids. I took a job one day a week. (9. hrs a day) as a receptionist for dr..A few years later it turned into two days a week and now it s been nearly 14 years. I get to interact with others and still be an introvert at home, go visit grandchildren etc.. I love part time !
NCJill says
Here’s a book recommended at book club “From mom to me again” by Melissa Shultz. Not sure if it talks about jobs but think it’s becoming an Empty Nester etc.
Candice says
I may be overstepping my bounds but I didn’t see anyone suggest this…start attending a non-denom church and get involved. Use the talents/gifts Lord has blessed you with to bless others.
darlene says
Mavis,
I don’t normally enter comments on blog sites, however, I am very inclined to chime in here. I would start by listing your interests (marketing, workshops, office job, customer support, etc). Then pull the skill sets to highlight in those areas. With the blog and Etsy shop you have the computer skills and marketing potential.
Many have chimed in on the garden shop ideas. Have you considered using your skill sets to help other women whether they be stay-at-home, newly divorced, etc. You could teach workshops on everything from gardening, canning, to home repairs, organization, etc.
Think about what you want out of this for yourself: socialization, joy of helping others, freedom and diversity. I don’t really see you as a person sitting in a cubicle from 9-5. Additionally, with everything else that you take on do you want a full-time position, part-time, or more free lance. You have a very strong, broad, and diverse skill set that would lend itself to many various areas.
Jennifer says
I did this a few years ago. I had stayed home for 10 years. I wanted to be on the school schedule along with my kids and husband – you might like it because it would allow you to travel a lot still and also have summers off. So anyway, I started subbing in the school district we live in. Pay wasn’t great but I set my own schedule which was important at the time. AFter a year and a half I got a job and have been working “full time” which is 35 hours a week for 3 years now. It is working out very well. The schools always need subs and then it becomes something to put on your resume.
I also like peoples ideas of a garden center.
Rose says
Hiya Mavis,
Don’t know if it’s been put out there…how about going through a temp agency? Different jobs and they can run from a couple weeks to a few months. It’s what I’m gonna do since its been about 8 years for me. I figure it’s kinda try before you commit to someplace permanently. Just a thought…Good Luck!
Tricia says
My step-mom runs a pet sitting service. She walks dogs, takes in cats in her designated cat room, watches a parrot sometimes and will even sleep over at your house if need be. She started out small, now has many employees and even had to hire someone to start keeping track of the books. She is making quite a bit of money. You can be however big you want. She loves animals yet still has human interaction. A great part time job for your children too!
Ruth says
My Dear Friend Mavis……
Lots of good ideas up above. But, you my dear aren’t you a……MENTOR!
And a cook book, craft, gardening, organizing / de-cluttering, sustainability, Author / Blogger / Teacher and all around Nice Person.
Getting outside of your comfort zone is good.
As a matter of fact, I have been considering demolition derby driving, skydiving, getting a tattoo, and dying my hair Magenta. Want to join me?
No really I have been going through a bunch of changes this past year and understand your needing to talk to other humans. Your emails have often made my day.
How about volunteering at your local elementary school having cute, awesome children read to you? Until you figure out your next step.
If I don’t find a suitable “holiday” job for myself, I will be dying my hair Magenta for Christmas and your invited to watch!!
Always Warm Regards, Ruth
OregonGuest says
Underneath it all, does this post have anything to do with your recent loss? If so, doing nothing new/different is a good move, at least while working through grief. If you are confident you’re not being reactionary, then I guess my response to your post is this: you may come to realize that no one will ever pay you what you’re worth (for you creativity, your initiative, your business acumen, your marketing expertise, etc.); and there are a LOT of other ways to have in depth social interaction, a feeling of purpose and being needed,. Rather than jump into anything at all, my vote would be to go see a counselor and then follow that up with a good, hard look at why you’re interested in making a change (probably some great books out there to help people navigate expected and unexpected life changes). Good luck!
Lissa says
Fantastc advice!
Rita says
I agree with those that suggested volunteering. You will be able to set the hours and amount of time you want to give up. You will lose a lot of freedom if you go out and get a “job”. I’m sure you will miss going back east, at the very least.
RebekahU says
I have not read the other comments but I think you would be an awesome life coach, or you could teach classes on blogging or photography or gardening, or you could host “get er done” sessions where you help others get their freezers stocked with 25 delicious meals. I hate hate hate to think of you in a cubicle. I spent 12 years working for a large national corporation. Can’t imagine going back. Your blog has taught so much and inspired so many. Whatever you do I hope you can continue to spark others into action and learning and making it exceeding goals. Please please please keep blogging. I’m addicted.
Laurie says
Excellent ideas!! I too an addicted to Mavis’s blog.
RebekahU says
Ok. Now I’ve read the other posts. I’m a beekeeper and I have just started selling at markets and festivals. I absolutely love it!! I get to choose when and where I go. I only offer what I want to. (You could offer produce or crafts or plants … Or flowers. Or whatever!). The cost is pretty low. And on market days you get to talk to everyone!!! That is the absolute best part. You are truly super talented. Anyone in a traditional office would hire you. You are clearly a self starter. You’d also do really well at organizing and either pet daycare or pet walking.
dawnelle says
I’m going back to school after almost 20 years at home and I am getting my RN. Long road ahead but I’m excited.
kim says
Mavis! I’m so loving your blog! I’ve been reading it for some time & look fwd to my daily fix! BUT please figure out a way to send the email earlier in the day so we can grab some of the great deals u post! Or at least some of the great deals in great colors! Lol I fell in love with cents of style & was ready to snag a bunch at those great prices. However, they were so picked over! If u can figure this one out, please do!
Mavis Butterfield says
Hi Kim, the daily deals are posted on the site generally before 6 am Sunday – Friday if you’d like to check them out earlier. I’ll see what I can do about changing the time.
SusieQ says
Volunteer!! I’ve been waiting for you to figure it out – you have some much energy and don’t really have to work – volunteering is so much more rewarding than anything I’ve ever done. The pay is so much more than money. Plus you can influence others to try it too.
cj says
Unless your looking to save money for something, I would second everyone on the volunteering. There are so many options and at all levels (menial work to board work) that you can do a lot or a little. I’ve only been at home for 5 years and am putting in my paperwork to sub in the school district as a para educator. It’s a whole in ball game with everything being online now. I think if you pick a job in retail or another minimum wage type job you’d go crazy (unless it was just the perfect fit). You are amazingly talented, organized, self motivated, and probably capable of running most of those places. And nothing bothers me more than doing work for somewhere that is unorganized or for someone who manages poorly, which I have found seems to be the casein most minimum wage/effort type jobs.
Christine says
Hi Mavis,
I’m in the same boat…kids grown. Have my lovely lively dog to talk to all day!
So many good comments and suggestions!
You’re basically self-employed! That old saying is true… ‘Once you’ve been your own boss it’s hard to work for someone else.’ Unless it is a really good one. That said, I’ve had several exceptional supervisors. So get out there and give it a try (or two or three).
Take good care of you. Best of luck and keep us posted!!!
Lynn says
Your experience as a blogger might open a door or two . . . and don’t forget author on that resume. Are there companies out there looking for someone to run their website? I’m sure you have picked up some valuable techie skills from all those years of blogging.
Carla says
I agree with all the people above about volunteering. I too needed to do something new, but didn’t want a job so I found a couple places to volunteer, and one of the things I’ve enjoyed most is getting to know some new cool people. So now I can applesauce for a food bank, work at a farm where half of the produce is donated to a school and the other half is divided between the volunteers, help at a mobile food bank and glean with the Pierce County Gleaners.
Sara says
I think you have an abundance of knowledge in the gardening area and would love to run into someone like you at my local nursery! Be picky when it comes to days and hours, it might open a new world of possibilities for you.
Toni from Mn says
You could be a sample lady at Costco.
Amber says
(Snort laughs)
More free food!
#goals
S says
You’ve received lots of great advice. I’ll add that you have SO MANY more options than you think! I work with lots of recent college grads in their first job at the be children’s hospital in the country. Believe it or not, they have the same misgivings you have! They underestimate their skills, abilities and potential. Sure, it’s important to be realistic, but job hunting is when you realize how much you know, what you’ve accomplished (especially with an amazing multi-post-a-day blog) and what YOU can bring to any organization. Do not apologize for your life choices; own your experiences, strengths and skills!
(p.s. Unless you’re a real psycho [which you’re not] no one really knows whether they work well with others until they encounter who they happen to be working with. Most everyone does just fine most of the time)
Tiffany says
I have been reading your blog for several years now. You have great financial insight and I think you might really enjoy getting a job at a bank as a teller. There are many part time positions and also some offer a peak time which is only usually during high traffic times like lunch or evening. It might be interesting for you to see how the rest of the world responds to their finances. I should disclose I work at a Bank and love it.
Nicola says
Dog walker! You’re already a writer, gardener, life coach, photographer, marketing rep and entreprenaur through your current job. I could totally see you walking neighbourhood dogs as a way to clear your head. Best wishes to you.
Cindy M. says
I never had that length of time without a job, but my situation has been an interesting sampling of different jobs, following different seasons in my life. While our two sons were growing up, I worked very part-time as a nurse – my husband has always been the bread winner. Towards the end of our youngest son’s high school years, I was very much wanting out of nursing and on a whim, and leap of FAITH, we bought a small Christian bookstore, which was mainly my responsibility for the 7 years we had it. It was an amazing, stressful, learning time in my life. We then relocated from rural Montana to Spokane and having let my nursing license lapse (which I was at total peace with) I worked part time as a barista at a large coffee lobby – what a hoot! I was the oldest on staff and had a blast with all of the younger kids and building relationships with so many customers. After doing that for 5 years I felt I was being called back into the medical field and got hired as a medical assistant at a cardiology office – while it was good to get “back into the groove” the full time position and constant overtime took its toll after 1 1/2 yrs. I quit and didn’t work for 3 years, spending a lot of time watching our grand daughter (which was awesome !) I still felt a longing to do something in the medical field and wanted to contribute in some way to our financial goals. Through what was only God-ordained situations, I started working a year ago at a large Orthopaedic practice, as a supplemental medical assistant and I LOVE IT!!! I have no problem with the idea that I am making way less than if I had still had my license-I have no problem “down grading” from a nurse to an MA, no regrets at all. I guess the moral of my story is to keep seeking God and His will for your life – I would never have seen my life playing out in this fashion but am so thankful that I took the advice of our youngest son and made that “one last call”, that put me where I am now. Gods best to you in your search!
mandy says
Great ideas here. I’m pretty much in the same position. I’ve always worked from home and it’s just not the same with my son going to college. That worked for a while, then he got married, she doesn’t appreciate me showing up randomly to organize, do laundry, cook and clean things for him.
I’m looking forward to seeing what you figure out for yourself. I did join a local community garden and get to be a bit more social that way. I’ve met alot of really nice people. It has made quite a difference, and on top of that I wear myself out after a few hours and am happy to be back home.
One thing I thought of for you, it wouldn’t help so much with socializing (with real people)…but you’re great at making up story lines for people. Your neighbors, construction workers, that guy from Florida and his girlfriend. Great stuff. Put all of those characters together and who knows what could come next! You’ve got quite an imagination on you girl. I’ve always appreciated that quality in you.
Jillbert says
Ugh, Mavis. I’m in your shoes. I took a crack at working and was hired based on my experience pre-kids. Sadly, the office was crazy-town! I quit after 9 weeks. Now, I’m afraid to try again, convinced that the only place that will hire me will be filled with intense lunatics! Ack!
Margaret @ Live Like No One Else says
Great suggestions here..but I wonder why it is that you want work outside the home? Is it for more money? You can create more hook rug items. Is it just to get out? Volunteering or someplace you thought you might want to work? IF we knew more, perhaps we could give better advice?
I owned a retail portrait studio for 9 years and was tired of it and moved out last Sept (semi-retired). I still do some location work and I sell on ebay. I considered trying to find a full time job, but just don’t want to. You just can’t be the flexibility of working for yourself!!
Teresa says
For the last 15 years I have been a piano teacher and have turned my living room into a studio. I understand the isolation of working at home. My business grew quickly and I made good money with many students. This year I decided to semi-retire to focus on other things. I love the fact that I control the whole show and do not want to get into the business world with all the b.s. that comes with it. So I supplement my time with taking classes, volunteering and enjoying life. To thine own self be true! I say get out there, volunteer, take a class and see where it takes you. You have a lot to offer. Best wishes Mavis 🙂
Lisa MTB says
Landscaping? Interior design? Home Management coach (I think a freezer meal workshop might resonate among busy people who don’t feel like they have time to cook properly during the week and Marie Kondo has certainly shown that people need help with cleaning out and organizing their “stuff”, which you are also good at)? Rug hooking teacher?
And you have online publishing cred, so really you have lots of options, plus all the regular 9 to 5 or part-time traditional job options and volunteer opportunities others have mentioned. You can be as busy and involved as you want.
I was at a workshop last night listening to a lady talk about her career as a knitting/crochet designer, writer, and teacher. She just sort of jumped into it and went from there!
I love that people have responded positively with so many comments to this post. Lots of helpful ideas and thoughts.
Vy says
I worked for myself for three years while doing the mom thing, then went back to a “real” job. The hands-down hardest, most exhausting part was the need to be constantly social. The “good morning” the smile at everyone that walked by, the casual conversations when I’d go to the kitchen or bathroom. It was HARD! It’s been a year now and I’m finally getting on top of it, but for a while there I’d come home and just sink into my own, quiet head.
The steady income is worth it, in my case, even though I mourn the fact my garden is only a fraction of what I’ve had in the past.
Tracy says
Mavis, I have been in a position to hire people just like you many, many times. I also coach lots of folks on how to make various career transitions. My advice to you will differ a bit from some of the comments I’ve read here, but here goes:
You are clearly a very intelligent woman, and very much a self-starter. I strongly urge you not to take a less skilled job like working at Starbucks, etc. They will not do anything to demonstrate your excellent organizational skills, writing talent, incredible self-motivation, and kind and positive nature. Instead, volunteer at an organization that has an impressive charter and mission. Even if you just help organize fund raising events, or help publish a newsletter, doing volunteer work for Habitat for Humanity, Planned Parenthood, (for some random examples) or some other clued in organization says much more about who you are and what you care about than slinging lattes at Starbucks. Now, if income and benefits are a prime motivator, there is nothing wrong with honest work at a Starbucks or similar company– nothing at all. But unless that’s all you want to do, I do not recommend it as a first step.
I think you could also use a bit of help at positioning what you DO currently do in professional-speak. You are head and shoulders above most ‘back to work’ Moms in skills and you need to understand why, have confidence in what you’ve accomplished, and know how to position it to future employers with real positivity.
If you’re interested, I’d be happy to spend an hour with you on the phone to walk you through how to do this. You have, I believe, access to my full name via my email address. You can check me out on Linked In to see my resume and a bit about who I am. Happy to do this for free for you, in exchange for having the pleasure of reading your posts for many months. See? You’ve already created value. If you’re interested, shoot me an email and I’ll tell you more.
Tracy 🙂
Marianne says
I think you would be great at Home Depot or Lowes. I think more than anything you want to show up somewhere and chat and help people. I think you would be great there. You get to move around talk to humans and help people with their home projects.
Sarah Rasmus says
In April I started working for the direct sales company Thirty-one Gifts. It is great because you set your own schedule, get out of the house as much as you want to party with other ladies, make some money and get discounts on totes and purses..what more could you ask for. My husband calls it my hobby because I have another job that I’d 8-4. I love getting paid for the work I put into it. For more info check out mythirtyone.com/Rasmus
Linda Tibbetts says
While volunteering is very worthwhile, if you want a paying job, I would not advise volunteering. As a former VP of HR (Human Resources) and retired college professor, I think your specific challenge will be to change your mindset from “I haven’t worked in 20 years” to “these are the things I’ve done that translate to things employers want.” You are one very talented woman, and the skills you already have are marketable. Have you considered contacting local Continuing Education programs (many high schools have them and so do many colleges) to apply to teach? You can teach many things”How to set up and maintain a blog” “Rug Hooking” “How to Save Money and Maintain Your Lifestyle”, etc. As opposed to 4 year colleges and universities, Continuing Ed programs are looking for skills, not advanced degrees. When my kids were young I made money teaching stuff like Starburst Quilting.
You could work in or even run a garden center with all the work you’ve done gardening and managing plantings.
Another area where you have superior skills that are transferable is with maintaining a company inter- or intranet. You’ve been doing this for years, and doing it well.
Any job that requires obtaining or synthesizing information, or writing are also areas where you can easily transfer your skills. Just sit down and think about it, then practice what you want to say to point out and sell those skills. If you read an ad your interested in, make two lists: the skills that company wants, and how your skills translate into those. Then you’ll be ready for an interview.
In short (too late, huh?) you’ve got it, girl! You just need to package it and wrap it.
God Bless you,
Linda
Amber says
I get a lot of good advice from Sheryl Crow:
“A change will do you good.”
And
“If it makes you happy, it can’t be that bad.”
Also, a road trip or stay away from home has the unique quality of clearing your head and enabling you to see your life at home objectively. Just call me your travel enabler. And take advantage of the new perspective.
Earlene says
I guess I have done both. I have been home for 20 years, then the last 15 1/2 years I’ve worked full time. Let me tell you, being home is the best, but if you need the money to live then go to work. Mavis, you do have a full time job, running a household is full time plus you garden, blog, craft and little odd jobs at home. I need to work and hate it! I’m on the verge of retiring and can’t wait. I want to volunteer, blog and clean my house! Things suffer when you work, there’s never enough hours in the day to get down what needs to be done! Good luck!
Emily B. says
The great news, and one you may have to remind yourself of, is that you don’t have to have everything perfected before you look for a job. We’ve all had 20+ years on the job to figure it out. And I can tell you firsthand there are quite a few kinks to still work out.
My two cents is to find out what gets you excited. Once you have a narrower scope on what to look for, that helps take out some of the overwhelming feeling. It’s easy to be relaxed and at ease speaking to someone about a potential job if you are knowledgeable and excited about it.
If money isn’t a motivation, I would recommend doing something like meals on wheels, to get your feet wet with the socialization. Those home bound people are SO excited to get any visitors.
Best wishes!
Cheryl says
You might also look at a Sales position for Botanical Interests, Seed Buyer or something along those lines; heck, they may even offer teleworking if you so desire.
Kathy says
I’ll throw my two cents in — open your own business designing garden spaces and/or chicken condos. Your business model could include either design only or design and build. You have a son who is going to eventually need a part-time job, and it would be a great opportunity for him.
Jennifer says
I was totally in your boat!!! After 15 years of staying at home I went back to work this year! We had moved in the recent year and taking a 14 year old to a moms group seemed unlikely… the pooch and I becoming wayy to close adult interaction was needed! My advice start small and volunteer is a wonderful idea!!! I found a great job… it is full timeThe people make the place awesome so I don’t want to leave but looking back starting small with part time or volunteer would have been a wiser choice
Deborah says
I would wear business casual in muted earthy tones with small splashes of color, flats, minimal jewelry. I would do my homework before going into the interview to understand what you are being asked to do in the position for which you are applying. That is where I would assess how much I should expect to be paid. I am not sure it matters the answer to the questions as much as your tone and demeanor in the interview.
I was home for nineteen years and went back to work. I love humor especially sarcasm and I had to kept those qualities in check while interviewing as well as my general quirkiness. (Staying home all of those years helped to hone some unique personal qualities and opinions about life.)
Most of us know the types of jobs that would drive us crazy. Apply for things for which you are already bent. I teach art in a small private school. I come home with globs of paint and chalk ground into my clothes. My fingernails are a disaster. My pay is lousy. I work many hours at home each week without compensation, but I honestly love what I do. Small people run to hug me and treat me like a rock star when I walk through the building. I love seeing the accomplishments of my students and I genuinely love being a part of their world. They give me back more than I ever give them. (I could not afford to do what I love apart from the support of my sugar daddy that I have been married to for almost 30 years.)
Sarah says
You’d make a amazing life skills coach for young women/mothers who need to learn the necessary skills to take care of themselves, their family and their home. Budgeting, managing time, cooking, living well with less…. your expertise, as I see it, is resource management. Time, money, food, stuff… lots of people need these skills (e.g., young adults, Newly divorced folks, widows/ers). Anyone going through a major transition could use your guidance. The trick is to figure out who is offering that service, or decide to offer it yourself if you’re feeling entrepreneurial.