Six years ago I grew spinner gourds along the front fence of the house we were living in at the time.
I LOVED watching those gourds grow. Checking on them everyday, giving them a little tlc and wondering just how far down the fence the vines would go.
I had seen a gourd garland {complete with cinnamon sticks, walnuts and orange slices} for sale in an antiques store and fell so in love with the garland {but didn’t want to pay $18 for it} that I bought a couple of packets of seeds instead so I could grow my own.
I was so proud of those little gourds! But then we decided to sell the house.
And well, the garden came with the house of course so I couldn’t just pull up all the plants I wanted to take with me. But just before we left I picked a large container of the little spinner gourds and told myself that I’d make a garland with them later that winter.
But I didn’t.
And three houses and six years later I still haven’t. I’ve even had photos of the gourds {planting, growing, drying, with holes drilled in them} for SIX YEARS on my phone!!
I’m never going to make that garland. I’d like to think that I am, but I know deep down I’m not {where would I hang it!? I don’t even have a fireplace anymore!}
Why do we hang on to things we aren’t going to use for so long?
How many pie plates can one person actually use? {Fact: I don’t think I’ve ever made more than 3 pies at a time.}
How many rugs can I possibly hook {unless I want to glue myself to a chair and not move for the next 10 years}? And anyways, I’m really enjoying hooking my own designs these days.
How many times can I re-read a book? Especially the craft books that I’ve already gleaned all the information from that I possibly could?
Yada yada yada… The great purge has begun. I thought we had gotten rid of a lot of things when we moved here… But it’s time to finish the job.
Yesterday I tackled the kitchen and craft room. Today the HH and I are going to go through the barn.
That might take a day or two… We’ll see.
Scaling back. Only keeping what we really use. Not buying anything else.
What a concept.
Seriously, does anyone know why we hang on to things we aren’t going to use for so long?
~Mavis
Jeanine says
Use the items you don’t want and either sell them or use as your giveaway’s on your blog. I know I would love any of those rughooking patterns. If I would like them, I’m sure someone else would too. Give it a go. Same goes with the gourds and pie plates. Although the gourds would look cute along your front fence in the fall.
Mavis Butterfield says
I know I’ll list the patterns and books on Etsy and donate the kitchen/household things to the little church thrift store… But it’s the process of really asking ourselves… Do I need this?
When was the last time I used it, and if it’s been a few years, when do I see myself realistically using it again. I think it’s easy to get bogged down with too much stuff and then it becomes overwhelming.
Letting go of “stuff” can be so liberating. Freeing. It makes you feel {me anyway} lighter. I don’t know, it’s hard to explain.
Jill Hamilton says
I call that de-crappifying.
Nancy Settel says
Oh those darling gourds would look wonderful made into a garland hung over your front door come fall! Would be darling but then again I am the queen of primitives. Also your book you have in the pile Seasons at 7 Gate Farms? Oh how wonderful it is even after all these years. I was at that house many times. Everything was wonderful and the gardens to die for. Both owners are gone now and I so wonder who bought it and what it is like now. Also a fun fact I have my very very very primitive candles in the home (covered in herbs and spices) on quiet a few pages of the book. You just can’t sell this book you will be so upset come one winter night when you want inspiration. Nancy Settel
Mel says
Can you not sell the garlands on Etsy if you made them?
Mavis Butterfield says
I already have so many other things to make though… That’s the problem. 🙂
Melissa says
Are you preparing to move again?
Linda M says
I thought the same thing!
Teri says
I thought that too!
Beebs says
I think Mavis is secretly a house flipper LOL
Kippy says
I bet she found a place in Great Britain and they have to super “decrappify” as Jill said. Shipping stuff abroad is very costly.
Rosemary says
I think it is a mindset that we “might need it one day”. Especially if we had parents growing up during the depression. There is a fear that we might not be able to get it again if we need it. I did a whole house declutter in 2023 and I have not regretted it once. If I need something that I gave away, I find something else to use instead. Even now, I continually put things aside that I don’t need. When I get a bag full, I donate it. Eventually I will need to sell my 4 bedroom house and downsize (there are only 2 of us) – decluttering it now will make that so much easier.
Jennifer says
Why is Lucy in the cone of shame?!? What happened?
J in OH-IO says
I wondered the same thing about why the “cone of shame” for dear Lucy!
Mavis Butterfield says
It’s an English bonnet. She hurt her right eye again. 🙁
debbie in alaska says
lol – I love that you call it an english bonnet – I hope she heals quick.
Brianna says
Be grateful you can at least get your other half on board to help. I cannot get my hubby to declutter. My kids will, but it takes a lot of effort on my part. I am torn on decluttering some things and maybe because I have no idea what to do with them….old baseball cards, canning equipment, wedding dress, American girl toys, etc….stuff I am happy to move on, but have no idea the right way to do it.
Ashley Bananas says
It’s often a cycle of acquisition and then letting go, then acquisition again. What point are we at to make us let go? You may be in a cycle, which is better than just holding on to everything in perpetuity.
Sue says
We hang onto those things because we want to believe in our best intentions, and we want to see those intentions fulfilled.
It isn’t a personal fault. It’s hope and belief.
Tracey says
YES! a resounding YES! It’s not all flotsam and jetsam!
My DH left this earth at the new year and behind him all the plans and ingredients for projects we hoped and believed we would see to the end. These projects got him up every morning singing THINGS TO DO! THINGS TO DO! long past his sell-by date. His doctors thought the world of him as he marched on 7 more years than they predicted. Get up every day with things to do – as I will – with all your ingredients there waiting for you. Hopefully your kids will see this as just as necessary as all the other ‘useful’ detritus.
Sue says
I am so sorry for your loss, Tracey.
Tracey says
Very kind of you to say. We were fortunate to have been able to spend a lot of time together and have a laugh. We are all marching in the same direction here; make the most of it – kind regards
Laurie M says
I was always a bit on the “lean” side after growing up in a family that seemed to have an abundance of items, but after I read The Art of Swedish Death Cleaning I really scaled back. Now if I could just help my mom do that 😉
Martina says
That book really helped me when I moved. Also I had to clear my parents homes in the past and didn’t want anyone to have to go through getting rid of a ton of my items when I pass.
Peg says
Ugh. My brothers, my husband, and I spent multiple months in 2021/2022 cleaning out our parents’ house. Mom was an only child, and both her and Dad were children of the depression. It was absolute hell, and the only reason we finished as quickly as we did was a dear family friend came to stay for 5 weeks, and literally pushed us (and worked harder than any of us) until we finished. I will never put my two children through that and regularly get rid of things. To this day, Mom thinks it’s funny.
Laurie M. says
I packed up my parents’ house (to be fair they had lived there for 50 years) to move to another state in a condo. I lived out of town and would go for 2 weeks at a time. Total I donated almost 200 garbage bags of stuff, 10 bags of hangers alone. And still there was so much stuff. I just don’t ever want to do that to my kids, and I have learned to enjoy what I have and really use it. No sense saving it for another day.
Gigi says
Because we put some thought or effort into it and don’t want to waste that effort. Ironically, we’ve been holding on to some bathroom towel hardware for 11.5 years. We just used it this week for a a different project (hanging spray bottles)
I would help you relieve the burden of that Selbu Mittens book. Haha I just got into color work knitting.
debbie in alaska says
My husband it sentimental and saves everything. On the plus side – he doesn’t buy a ton of things. I – on the other hand – am always purging. I love the feeling of being untethered and owning less things. I never sell things – I always just bring things to the office (or to my friends) to give away for free.
Laurie M. says
I love this and it’s the exact circumstance I’m in ;). I started a buy nothing group in my neighborhood and got a little free library. It makes me so happy to see even the littlest thing get reused by someone else instead of being thrown out (or stored in my house!!!)
Sue S. says
Because I have that “someday” mindset. Someday I’ll fit into it, or someday I’ll go looking for it, and most of all it’s a memory you don’t want to let go of. 50 years in the same house and I’ve realized it’s time to purge so someone else doesn’t have to.
maureen detmer says
yankee mentality….being practical, frugal, self reliant, hence throwing nothing out as you may need it one day
Heather says
This post had the most perfect timing for my life. My father and musician and artist just passed away. I am currently sorting through all of his treasures. An entire storage unit. Some of my favorites are an entire box filled with dog bones that have already had all the marrow cleaned out, 30 empty tequila bottles, thousands of popsicle sticks (dyed from the popsicle), shells, wood pieces, etc.
Dawn says
I just realized I own two trifle bowls. I rarely make one trifle, never mind two. I’m sure I bought both but why the second? Did I forget I already had one? Did I loan the first to someone, forget about it and buy the second then get the first one back? Was I planning a trifle pot luck? The only thing I know for certain is that I bought both at Marshall’s so at least I didn’t pay much for them.
Don’t even get me started on my apparent obsession with barware.